Like there is even a question...

Why were it not for daily applications of Nair and corrective lenses, I would be a hairy nearsighted um... diddler.

Every place you can imagine I've done it. Probably.

I need help.

Why yes, now that you ask- my ex used to whack off "in his sleep" all the time. So often in fact that I do not believe it was in his sleep. With me beside him, usually fairly willing if he'd bothered to notice. Fucker. It generally pissed me off to the point where we'd fight and yell loudly.

my now hubby (different guy) doesn't do it in his sleep that I'm aware of, and neither do I, but when either of us wake up interested, we wake the other - even to semi concious states. He and I have done it together which can be hot.

Ex was good about not wanting to be disturbed. Especially not for sex, which her lesbian therapist convinced here was "always an unwelcome intrusion in a woman's body".

I got used to rubbing them out quietly and without shaking the bed.

You would be amazed and apalled to know the places. Really.

Ogger: Ok, but were you ever asleep when doing it?

Wad: Nair? Seriously?

Asleep. Awake. Altered conciousness of many types. Once, while wearing a monitoring blood pressure cuff and taking valium.

I think he means nair as in to keep palms hairless.

Og's got that right.

N'Guh Broad.

Lot's o places for me. Too many across the region to mention. Workplaces, schoolplaces, homeplaces, other peoples home places, hotels...

If they managed to screen out my um.. genetic material from some places, they could build an army...

An army of wad.

Not gonna see that on a commercial any time soon...

Aw, dude. You didn't do it in MY can, did you!?!? Because ew. That would just be weird.

Is that what was in the litter box at your 30th?

Squikked out,
Dix

In your can...

On your can...

With your can...

Thinking about your can...

Ok. ew. Never mind.

Dix?
Masturbators shouldn't whack off in glass houses.

Unless their female and quite fetching when viewed from behind bushes and in trees.

Perhaps the weas should weigh in on this issue. As I understand he is likewise saddled with the problem of too much free time....

I just realized that I used to improper usage of their.

Ugh. I need a job.

They're. Their. There.

I can't wait to explain that to The Boy.

"Ew" is right, Wad. When did YOU ever think about my can, other than to laugh at its wide whiteness?!?!

Is there irony in the fact that we're discussing masturbation in a blog, one of the web's most onanistic creations?

Last I heard, Weas found work. For the moment anyway. Him's got good headhunters.

Pausing long enough to type this with one hand,
Dix

Put your hands where we can see them, Dix.

if you had a sidebar link to Ampland it would save me a lot of time.

Ampland? Who dat?

ampland.com. SHeesh, where do YOU get your porn?

I have my own stash, thankyouverymuch. But ampland looked good. I'll have to check it out.

Still a Playboy man after all these years. I even have proof that people do read it for the articles... in the form of a braile version of the December 1996 issue. (And contrary to what you may believe from watching "Men In Tights", there is no braile version of the centerfold.)

Deborah "Debbie" Gibson's in Playboy this month. Is it wrong that my breasts are almost bigger than hers? Time to start dieting again, I guess.

Wishing he looked as good at 30/25/heck, 20 as Deborah does at 34,
Dix